We ended our evening with the White Hot Party, following the Perfect Couple Game Show.
Lunch was at O’Sheehans again, after docking in Puerto Vallarta. I can’t decide which port I like the scenery in the bay better: PV or Cabo. Each is unique in its own way.
Sorry Mazatlan, your dock area is also a working shipping port, and not very pretty. Although watching from a lounge chair on deck seven, the guys in camo with a drug-sniffing dog down on the dock below direct the unloading of one particular shipping container was an interesting way to pass the afternoon on Wednesday.
Thursday however, my wife got the bug to get off the ship. Fortunately, there are enough little shops right off the dock, that she didn’t make me wander far. Her quest to spend her cash on a small piece of jewelry was quickly accomplished in the third shop we visited. $35 dollars and half an hour of walking the small shopping plaza was enough.
We finished our final port call and set sail. As we were wandering into Azura for an early dinner, we met up with a couple from our Cruise Critic Meetup group. We shared a table with them and chatted away the dinner hour.
Wife and I headed up to Spinnaker for music from Essence (the reggae band that is normally poolside). Good musicians, but my wife pointed out that they don’t have all of the standard rock pieces memorized. They sang the first verse to Sweet Home Alabama three times in a row.
Following that, we drifted down the theater for JP’s funny magic or magical funny show. Good fun. Kids welcome. Like Disney movies, his adult humor is vague enough that the kids won’t understand but funny enough for the adults.
After that, wife wanted to head out to the White Hot party for some group dancing (Mr. Lack of Rhythm doesn’t dance). Before that, we went back up to Spinnaker for the Perfect Couple Game Show.
The game shows are always hit or miss, depending on the type of contestants they pull. A general rule, however, is that they contain adult humor and easily can go to adult type themes (Dating game, Perfect Couple, etc). Leave the kiddos somewhere else. Their presence with parents who are contestants has limited the contestants’ ability to cut loose and take the fun up a couple of notches.
This show, however, turned out surprising good and allowed us to find a perfect couple.
Our assistant CD To
m was the Emcee for the evening. He kept asking for couples to sign up and drop their names in a bucket out front. He drew three sets of names from the entrants. If I remember correctly Gracie and Ronnie were first. My apologies to the second couple, but I’ve forgotten your names. Mike and Marcie were third.
Couple #1 (Gracie and Ronnie) had been together about five years, Couple #2 about ten years, and Couple #3 (Marcie and Mike) were the youngsters in the relationship scene, at about five months together.
The first challenge was for a couple, to hold – without their hands – an orange positioned between them at belly-button level. They had to move the orange up to under one of their chins, without using their hands. With all three couples on the dance floor, Tom called for action. There was much grinding, hugging, and dropping of fruit, but Couple #3, Mike and Marcie prevailed.
Contest #2 involved the lady of each couple, loading a lemon into the gentleman’s left pant leg from below (the cuff level), push it up into the crotch area, over into the other pant leg, and roll it down the right leg.
Oh, and the lemons were in ice water prior to the contest.
Couple # 2 looked like sure winners before any lemons were rolled since the gent in that couple had on shorts. Until Tom pulled a full sized pineapple to use in place of the lemon. But, a frustrated look from Gent #2, allowed a “twice around” with a lemon.
I suspect some shading of times in this contest since Gent #1 (Ronnie) had very loose pant legs, and the lemon dropped right out… But the official score keeper declared Mike and Marcie the winner by a few seconds.
Another round involved a “Pole in the Hole” where the blindfolded lady, clutching a broomstick at crotch level, had to follow direction from her gent to get the pole into the center hole of a toilet paper roll… held between the gents’ legs, right under the … um… you know.
Gracie seemed to be the best with understanding her man and won that round.
The final round involved balloon popping. The Ladies had to carry an inflated balloon between their knees over to their gents, and pop the balloon with pressure from their embrace. The first position was a simple hug, where the balloons attempt to skitter out sideways. If a couple seemed to have problems, a cruise staffer was by their side to coach them or lend the occasional sharp fingernail to get the contest back on track.
The ladies all seemed to enjoy the second popping position, which involved the gent sitting in a chair, and the ladies would pop the balloons by sitting aggressively on their laps.
The third position was the gent bent over the chair, presenting their bums to their ladies. The women would get a bit of running start with the balloon at pelvic level, and ram it to pop. Couple #2 seemed to have a bit of an issue in this spot. So a helpful cruise staffer stepped in to hold the balloon gingerly in place, while the lady got a good run up.
Ooops, he pulled it away at the last minute. Go again.
Oops, he pulled the balloon away, as couple #2 bumped again. Laughter ensued.
The final position had the gents lay on the floor, and the ladies had to plop down with a balloon under their tush, onto the gent’s pelvis to pop (hopefully just) the balloon. Couple #2, perhaps enjoying their pelvic bumping from the last position (or perhaps they had a stubborn balloon) spent about half a minute bouncing up and down to get the balloon to pop.
The audience roared with laughter throughout this show. The couples were all good sports, and willing to give their all, including their dignity, for the contest.
In the end, Tom announced that Couple #3 was the winner. Cruise staffers handed each couple a bottle of champaign, and Tom handed something special to Mike, along with the microphone.
I probably won’t get the quotes exact, but here’s what happened next as best as I can remember.
Mike looked at Marcie, and raised the microphone up. Marcie’s face moved from puzzled to stunned look as she spied the small box, about the size of a ring box that Tom had handed Mike.
“Marcie, you mean the world to me,” Mike said. Marcie raised her hands to her mouth, her eyes wide as he explained that he wanted to spend his life with her.
Dropping to one knee, Mike asked “Will you be my wife?”’ Marcie flung her arms around the man kneeling in front of her. The audience erupted in a huge cheer.
After a passionate kiss, she pulled the mic over to her. “A definite YES!” she told the crowd as we clapped and cheered the happy “perfect couple.”